Wife and I are splitting up. I haven't used that wording yet. "Splitting up". It feels less harsh than using the word "divorce". Anyways, here are the answers to some of the questions you'll be asking when you read this post:
1) Yes, we've seen this coming. You may or may not have been a part of the misery over the past few years. If you were, I'm sorry that you were dragged into this. I do appreciate you're guidance, support and love.
2) No, there's really nothing you can do. I'd say pray, but frankly I'm not sure what to ask you to pray for. I feel like an empty well.
3) I don't know. It will have to be handled delicately to lessen the effect on them, but we all know that it will change them for the rest of their lives. For this (and many other reasons), I am profoundly sad. This is the reason I cry the most.
I appreciate all of the things you WOULD say to me, if you were here with me. You would, no doubt, set a hand on mine or hug me or pat my shoulder. You would said supportive things and agree with "my side". You would console me and take my mind off of it for a little while. Thank you for that.
2007 was hellish year and it looks like the roller coaster hasn't stopped yet. No wait, I like roller coasters...and this ride isn't fun in the least.
I may not post much in the coming months...or maybe I will.
At the moment, though, I have run out of words.
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3 comments:
Oh E...
I know. Been there. I understand. The one thing I would add to all the things you already know I'd say... Whatever happens, keep hope. Hope that you can still make life ok, for you, for her, for the kids.
My ex and I are now good friends, and we work very hard at working TOGETHER for our daughter, putting aside our own differences to do what's right for her. She still sees us as a team in raising her. She knows she can't play us against one another, that if she says "but Mom said I could"... Dad is going to call Mom and confirm, and we'll come to agreement. We back each other up. We still support one another.
I hope, first, that you don't split. I really do. It's harder to do it that way. I know this from experience. But IF you do, I hope that you can remain the team you'll have to be ANYWAY for the rest of your lives.
Ok. That was a lot of stuff.
I'm here. Even if I don't answer emails or phone or whatever. I'm still here.
E,
I'm sorry to hear it. I can't add
much to what Joy's already said, but I can tell you that my kid brother has gone through what you are and from what I've seen in his whole situation is if you do split, it will be difficult for you at first but it does get better.
Damn, that sounds so inadequate.
Anyway, I'll keep good thoughts for you all.
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